"Why does my affirmation of strength offend you?"
~ Ruby's Daydreams
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Contrary to popular belief, I'm not all positive. I'm not all feel good, and I'm not one dimensional. I'm potent because I allow space for my strengths and weaknesses. I do not live in other people's limited perspectives.
I am a person of excellence, and I try my very best consistently. But that doesn't make me perfect, and it doesn't make me immune from human frailty. So I will not allow you to limit my right to be imperfect, and my right to know who I am - even when you don't. In the past, well meaning friends have tried to limit me and tell me who they think I am. Primarily painting me to be Miss Perfect because I'm ambitious, persistent, and accomplished. And when I made mistakes or stepped outside of their comfortable limited views of me, they condemn my behavior either with thinly vieled caustic humor or outright accusation. What made it difficult in identifying their projections was that their intention was well meaning. But I had to balance out their supposed good intention "to help" with how I FELT, and I never feel good when others attempt to limit my humanity. When I feel sad, angry, persecuted, victimized, betrayed, [fill in any negative emotion], then I don't want to have my humanity limited and expected to quickly "get over it" or expected not to react at all. You don't have to listen to me. I can certainly find another friend to lend an ear. But you will also not control me. How did I solve this dilemna? 1. I listened to how I felt and how I reacted, not just the well meaning intention of the speaker. But also how I feel or receive the message is just as important as the message. Am I perfect? No, so I do listen to valid suggestions. But often the intention was mixed with their control issues so I took into consideration if this "friend" was attempting to control the situation or me. As opposed to genuinely sharing healing advice about forgiveness, peace of mind, and maturity. I'm really great at listening and respecting friends so I expect the same benefits in return. 2. I limited my interaction, and in some cases discontinued the friendships, with these controlling people. Because ultimately a controlling person will soak up all the compassion from you, and then condemn you when you attempt to extract some of that in return. Ultimately, I'd rather preserve my self-respect which means accepting my good with my bad. I am dimensional, and my real friends get that. "I can Help more poor people if I’m Not one of them." - Ruby's Daydreams #SelfEmpowerFirst #CommunityEmpowerSecond #Responsible "I’m genuinely suspicious of others who require me to have Less. I don’t care if it’s a jealous ‘loved’ one, or someone with low self-esteem. They don’t have my best interests in mind, and so I have to disregard them." - Ruby's Daydreams "People will run from you if you’re Needy and Entitled. You can be one or the other. But being both is Exhausting to people because we can sense your desperation but are annoyed by your attitude." - Ruby's Daydreams "I switched out the tape that said, I have to work extra hard in order to receive a percentage of what I give." - Ruby's Daydreams "I put in the tape that said, I can receive More than I give. Life is Easy." - Ruby's Daydreams "I find it difficult to work in teams because conformists are burdensome." - Ruby's Daydreams "Don't participate in relationships that require you to give up your power." ~ Ruby's Daydreams "Being an Aquarius, I always feel 10 years ahead of my time, and 10 years behind." ~ Ruby 's Daydreams #AquariusQuotes #Visionary #RebelWithACause "The Offputting Duckling," is an illustrated story about a NONCONFORMIST duckling. It's available in ebook form. Buy your copy today!
http://www.lulu.com/shop/ruby-faagau/the-offputting-duckling/ebook/product-20080759.html |
RubyPasifika Writer and Artist Archives
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